The Calendar Girls need to answer for their crimes

In today’s issue of yesterday’s paper (delayed because the country seems to be fundamentally shocked that it might receive snow annually, much less in winter) was the new Women’s section. So far, it’s been as expected, cupcakes, ugly jewellry and older women wearing too much make-up and too little clothing (a decidedly British conceit, I’ve realised).

Today’s fashion centrepiece was definitely worth reaching for the antacids. Amateur boxers are raising money for a trip to New York to take boxing lessons. Their brilliant brain wave to raise money was of course, a naked picture calendar. Because that’s what you do as a woman of a certain age; strip down and cheekily cover your lady bits with boxing gloves.

I enjoy the odd naked-picture calendar as much as the next person, Dieux de Stade coming to mind immediately. What I oppose is its continued use by amateur operations as a guaranteed money-maker. It’s not edgy to cheekily hide your lady bits under a pair of boxing gloves. It’s not attractive to have poorly posed and badly lit images of yourself. Have some pride and hire a decent photographer!

In the end, it’s only going to be the friends and family you bully into buying nine copies each who own your nudie calendar, so at least make it something the grandkids will enjoy looking at, rather than a collection of black and white images of fleshy, glistening, face-topped lumps.

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About tara

Often heard to refrain "I left San Francisco for this?" Formerly homeschooled. Living the dirt-poor post-student expat life in various non-urban areas of England's North. Sanity preserved by cooking yummy foods for a multiple allergy diet.
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